Rocky Horror Picture Show is my HAPPY PLACE

I don't know how it happened or why because it really shouldn't be any one's HAPPY PLACE, but it is mine. Last year I vowed that this year I would dress as Columbia from the movie, but ALAS, I am not.

I will, however, watch this movie tonight - maybe have a glass of wine and indulge in my HAPPY PLACE. That sounds dirty - not my intention!!!!

Happy Haunting

On the up and up

I AM A SUPER HERO - I know that now... Yesterday was a low day. I am feeling much better.

My left eye is feeling yucky still - is it normal to lose a lot of eyelashes in one eye in a short period of time?

How to lose friends and alienate people

I swear to god that I think something is wrong with me as a human being. I don't talk to my mom because we fought too much and I 'broke up' with her. I don't really talk to my dad now because me not speaking with my mom puts him in the middle.

Since I moved out of my sister's place, I haven't seen her nor really talked to her, other than when she got a hair cut and needed me to talk her down.

I don't talk to my brother who lives in concord because honestly he is just a waste. I text occasionally with my oldest brother, but that is it.

My family has cancelled Thanksgiving and Christmas this year as well. Now I am beginning to think it is me. Honestly, I don't think I am that bad of a human being. I really consider the thoughts and feelings of other people upon making decisions and living my life.

I just wonder if when I think I am being the super hero, I am really the villain

Retinal detachment is not the issue

I just did a search online to determine what is kicking my left eye's ass (if it had an ass). At first I thought it was retinal detachment, it isn't:

Symptoms of Retinal Detachment
In most cases, retinal detachment develops slowly. The first symptom is often the sudden appearance of a large number of spots floating loosely in the eye. The person may not seek help, because the number of spots tends to decrease during the days and weeks before detachment. The person may also notice a curious sensation of flashing lights as the eye is moved.
Because the retina does not contain sensory nerves that relay sensations of pain, the condition is painless.

Because my issue is PAINFUL - it isn't this - but I was seeing Flashing lights and spots. So, then I googled EYE PAIN -
I have had a little Eyelash loss - so it says it could be Madrosis - which causes include infections, metabolic disorders, inflammation of the eyelid (AKA blephartis), certain drugs, lupus erthematosus and trauma. Or how about COMPUTER VISION SYNDROME - the symptoms are eye strain, dry eyes, blurred vision, red or pink eyes, burning, light sensitivity, headaches and pain in shoulders, neck and back. THAT COULD BE IT.

This website I found was A-Z for pain issues - I need to walk away.

That's it - I have had it

If one more person asks me what's wrong, or why I look so frazzled I may just go postal. I am tired, I have a headache, I haven't eaten ANYTHING yet today because I have been working on the damn claim summaries that I started on Wednesday and had to re-write them for a third time today - and I am quite overwhelmed.

Plus we had a half hour meeting that turned into an hour meeting changing all of our "Best Practices" to Requirements and I am just learning the old practices and now they are changing them - and then right before the meeting ended, we were advised that not all of these changes effect INVOLUNTARY MARKET, which is what I do... So, I don't really know my ass from my elbow right now.

People tick me off

There is a nurse at work who is assigned to our team and whenever you refer stuff to her she comes up w/ every excuse to not do the referral. She was out on Short Term Disability for three weeks and today is her first day back and she is questioning every damn thing. I want to scream.

My new FAVORITE SONG

Na Na Na Na Na Na Na
Na Na Na Na Na Na
Na Na Na Na Na Na Na
NaNa Na Na Na Na

I guess i just lost my husband
I don't know where he went
So i'm gonna drink my money
I'm not gonna pay his rent (Nope)
I got a brand new attitude
And i'm gonna wear it tonight
I wanna get in trouble
I wanna start a fight
Na Na Na Na Na Na Na I wanna start a fight
Na Na Na Na Na Na Na I wanna start a fight

So so what?
I'm still a rock star
I got my rock moves
And i don't need you
And guess what
I'm having more fun
And now that we're done
I'm gonna show you tonight
I'm alright, I'm just fine
And you're a tool
So so what?
I am a rockstar
I got my rock moves
And i don't want you tonight

Uh, check my flow, uh
The waiter just took my table
And gave to Jessica Simp- Shit!
I guess i'll go sit with drum boy
At least he'll know how to hit
What if this song's on the radio
Then somebody's gonna die
I'm gonna get in trouble
My ex will start a fight
Na Na Na Na Na Na Na He's gonna start a fight
Na Na Na Na Na Na Na We're all gonna get in a fight!

So so what?
I'm still a rock star
I got my rock moves
And i don't need you
And guess what
I'm having more fun
And now that we're done
I'm gonna show you tonight
I'm alright, I'm just fine
And you're a tool
So so what?I am a rock star
I got my rock moves
And i don't want you tonight

You weren't there
You never were
You want it all
But that's not fair
I gave you love
I gave my all
You weren't there
You let me fall

So so what?
I'm still a rock star
I got my rock moves
And i don't need you
And guess what
I'm having more fun
And now that we're done (we're done)
I'm gonna show you tonight
I'm alright(I'm alright),I'm just fine (I'm just fine)
And you're a tool
So so what?
I am a rock star
I got my rock moves
And i don't want you tonight
No No, No No
I Don't want you tonight
You weren't there
I'm gonna show you tonight
I'm alright, I'm just fine
And you're a tool
So so what?
I am a rock star
I got my rock moves
And i don't want you tonight
Ba da da da da da

Scatterbrained

Seriously, I woke up this morning with a great idea for a blog and it is totally gone...

I think it was about how I had this crazy, intense dream that I think I dreamt the whole night and my alarm went off - and I was like WOW - but immediately forgot it - but then woke up tired.

So, I wonder if you have a very active dream (I know I didn't move at all because I woke up in the same position I went to sleep in and my hair still looked FABULOUS!) if it makes you even more tired when you wake up? And how come after a full night of rest (okay, maybe not full) that one wakes up STILL tired?

Extra coolness to share

Effective today - I have COVERED PARKING! YAY!

I am officially OFFICIAL

I received my STATE OF NEW HAMPSHIRE INSURANCE DEPARTMENT Worker's Compensation Adjuster's license yesterday in the mail.

I feel really cool. I only had to take the TEST ONCE, not like the test to be a teacher that I had to take the math part 5 times... Sadly, I let that lapse too so if I EVER want to teach again in the state of NH, I would have to take the dang PPST's again.

Nonetheless, I am official now baby. First I got business cards, then I won a shiny case to put them in and NOW, I have a license.

Frankly, I am prodigious!

Lately I have been really crafty and have come up w/ some inventions - and thought I would share.

Triple GAY - this is a road side service particularly for Gay people. Also, certain hotels, parks, etc would be TRIPLE GAY approved.

Purrrrr-active- since it is a well known fact that there is such a thing called Kitty Acne, there should be a kitty blend of Proactive for just that.

Aren't I crafty?

The Misadventures of Millsie J. Mills

That is what I want to name my book - because lord knows I have some crazy stories.

First and foremost - It would be about Millsie J. Mills because in college, everyone just called me by my last name, Mills - which I love. One of my friends, Shua, actually thought that Mills was my first name, and I said, "You are right, my name is Millsie J. Mills" and he asked what the J. stood for and I said ANDREW! hehehehe. (People who know me all too well will get the J./Andrew reference)

So, yesterday, wasn't a great day. A doctor really patronized me on the phone, my shoulder hurt and I just wanted to be home. I had decided that on my way home I would FINALLY stop at the library and get a library card. Cory Lee had advised me of a series of books she had read that she thought I would like, so I wanted to go. Plus, a few weeks before that Shaine had driven me by the Libs so I could see where it was. YAY. I had my application and my electric bill because I hadn't updated my license yet (I had w/ the DMV but not put a new sticker on the back). So, I take a left at Exit 14, head by the holiday inn and think I have enough time to make the yellow light. It turned red but I thought I had made it appropriately. Um.... NOPE!

FLASHING BLUES! I have only gotten ONE ticket in my life and it was in 2002, well, let's make that TWO NOW. I couldn't find my registration, I couldn't do a damn thing right and he gave me a $72 ticket. Oh ya. A warning would have sufficed. So, I still can't find my registration btw.

So, I accept my ticket, let him get back in his car. START BAWLING because I don't have spare cash for a ticket and then I realize I don't have any idea where the Libs is. I pulled over and started blubbering like an idiot and realized the damn library was right in front of me.

I go in, get my card and book and leave and as I was heading home, stopping at EVERY yellow light I see another Concord Cop pulling over another lady. They are on the prowl, so drive safe.

Ebert and Mills - or so it should be

I went and saw two movies yesterday. One is a double thumbs up and one is a double thumbs down.

I saw HOUSE BUNNY. OMFG! Hilarious. It was just laugh out loud, throw your head back and laugh funny. I recommend it because it isn't really thought provoking but the underlying theme is good and it is just a cute all around movie.

Tropic of Thunder was so stupid. I texted thru the whole movie. The best part of the movie, and I hate to say this, is the CAMEO of Tom Cruise. I hate Tom but he was so freakin funny in this movie. Jack Black didn't do a darn thing funny. However, Robert Downey Jr was really funny too, but not in a laugh out loud kind of way, in like a hmmmmmmmm kind of way. I know they say it is the come back of the R rated comedy but I think this movie was a flop. This was in no way close to 40 year old virgin funny or even Knocked up funny.

I suck at life - part deux

So today I was supposed to take the day off as my friend is having surgery but since there is a huge WC convention and half the office is out, I was unable to take the day. I feel like a schmuck. I really do.

Score!

I just received an email from a Volleyball team that needs a girl to play on their team. I am so excited. I haven't played since before I moved to the seacoast and this team is right here in Concord - I will only have to drive within the town I live. YAY!

Adventures in Babysitting

At 6am this morning, when I got up, I had a great idea for a blog today - a funny anecdote from the recesses of my mind - and now it is gone. It was funny. But no clue what it was

I woke up with the words to a song I have only heard ONCE in my life in my head and KENNY CHESNEY was in my dream - which took place on School Lane, which is an off shoot of the street I grew up on.

I REMEMBER NOW...

I have never been a babysitter really. I have babysat a few times in my life and the horrible times out weigh the good. Like the first time I babysat was for a newborn/infant. My mom was adamant that I take the babysitter course before I do any babysitting, which I think was smart because knowing me as well as I do, I should take a class before I do just about anything...

Well, with this baby, I had never EVER changed a real diaper. The babysitting course taught me how but not with real feces. So, I opened up this diaper and it was GREEEEEEEEEN. I definitely know it ain't easy being green because I vomited right on the child. OH YA. And there was the last time I EVER baby sat for an infant.

The 2ND horrible experience is when I was babysitting for neighbors up the road and the kids were in elementary/middle school so no diaper issues, but the house was set on a weird slope of the road where sometimes cars would end up in their front yard. Jokingly, before the parents went out they said, "DON'T BOTHER US, EVEN IF A CAR ENDS UP IN THE FRONT YARD!" (you know where this is going, huh?)

Lo and behold a car landed up in the front yard. Interestingly enough, my first thought was to call the police because the driver of the vehicle asked me not to call authorities because her license was SUSPENDED... DING DING DING... I called the police and then called the GRANDMOTHER of the kids I was watching to let her know the dilly...

So, this is why I do not EVER BABYSIT.

I also want to say along w/ my adventures in babysitting it is also an example of a SMALL WORLD. I used to work with the STEP MOTHER of the infant I vomited on (and am still good friends with her) and I just found out this morning that Shaine's mom used to go to the house where I was babysitting and hang out doing crafts. Shaine used to go with her at times, which means Shaine used to hang out 3 houses down from me.

Crazy, huh?

Big Oopsie

I guess by me saying that I spent time with my best friend over the weekend hurt some feelings....

I guess there are different stages of best friends. People you have known for almost 2 decades and may not see every day but pick up like there was never any time apart, and email or chat daily over the internet, that would constitute a best friend.

Also, there are best friends that you see everyday and it doesn't feel right if you haven't talked to them or hung out with them.

One isn't better or worse than the other. I should just feel lucky that I have both types of best friends.

Oktoberfest=October fun

This passed weekend Shaine and I went up to Bartlett, NH to go to Oktoberfest at Attitash. I have been approximately 5 times (can't really remember all the details) and Judy Powers (my best friend) was going to be there and I wanted Shaine to meet her.

We had a blast - although Shaine and I neglected to eat before all the beer, we still had a great time. Shaine attempted the Stein holding competition! YAY Shaine.

After Oktoberfest, we went to Dick's house (Judy's brother) In Fryeburg, ME and the party continued. I kind of pooped out but Shaine was a champ and stayed up until the end of the red sox game - he stayed up longer than anyone.

We got up and drove home and had the SLOWEST car in front of us - and just when I had an opportunity to pass, I almost killed us - it was like the slow car sped up or something. Then, out of the blue comes a HUGE MOOSE! So, in retrospect, if I had been able to pass the slow car, I probably would have hit the moose.

Chuck Norris for President

Chuck Norris was on 100.3 Wheb this morning - they had up to 45 minutes with him, and they talked for basically my whole commute this morning.

Chuck has a new book out entitled, "Black Belt Patriotism: How to Reawaken America" and he was discussing this book and his views on the war in Iraq and just his views on faith and the 'Hollywood Life'. If he ran for president he would have my vote. I definitely want to read his book now too.

He didn't know about the Chuckisms that we all know and love (especially on FLAIR at face book) but he said he thought when he first heard about them that it would last a few weeks - and then when he went to IRAQ and there were tons of the CHUCKISMS written in the commode. He knew he had made it then... hehehehehehe.

Chuck would get my vote, let me tell you.

a day that will live on in infamy.

I woke up this morning and got ready for work - and just before I left, I went to feed my fish, Amaretto, and he was dead- belly up minus the sparkle in his eyes.

It is an end of an era today. Let me set the scene, picture this 6/9/07 (not only was it Michael J. Fox's birthday) it was Cory Lee's wedding day. She had a gloriously coffee themed reception and every table had a name. My table was entitled Amaretto. The centerpieces we vases with Beta Fish in them. I luckily won the centerpiece and therefore named my fish after our table. Sadly, Amaretto is now in the big fish bowl in the sky.

Has reality tv lost its spark for me?

I didn't watch the last season of Big Brother because I didn't even know it had started - I felt slighted... And now, my DVR didn't record the first episode of Survivor Gabon and I don't really feel any connection to it... What is happening to me?

However, I did watch all of Dancing with the Stars last night, which I normally DO NOT WATCH. Survivor is MY SHOW. I won the survivor pool last year at work, like it is my favorite show and I don't feel a connection to it this year.

it's definitely time to make the doughnuts

Yesterday on the way to the Corn Maze, we stopped at Dunkin Donuts in Concord to get coffee and donuts for the girls - THEY DIDN'T HAVE ANY DONUTS... Seriously? Seriously. So, we left mid order and went to another one - and THEY didn't have any donuts...

I don't understand if DONUT is in your name, isn't it a requirement to have EFFEN DONUTS?

When we pulled up to get our coffee I asked what time they make the donuts and she said they are made in the morning and that is ALL they have... Seriously?

Something wicked this way comes...

I had a horrible nightmare last night. It was like a bad Rob Zombie movie. I can't remember how it started but it ended up that there was this Mad Max kind of Fraternity and they would gang rape women and then remove their skin - some how I became the next victim.

The most vibrant part of this dream was that I was trying to escape this motley crue of scary fraternity brothers and we were on this rural road - but not rural enough that there weren't houses or anything - and this gaggle of scary dudes came up on me on foot as well as in some vehicles and every time I screamed for help to the people standing in their driveways, they would rev the engines of their vehicles to drown out my pleas for help... I was wearing a skirt and one of the guys removed my underwear. Another guy had many Prince Albert piercings and was completely exposed and another of the guys started removing his pants and exclaimed, "We have killed seven people today and had NO SEX!" and when he started to remove his pants he had growths and fungus and yuckiness all in his genital area.

I started to run away into the field and someone yelled to me, a woman who knew me well enough to yell, "Mary-Elizabeth Katherine Mills - what is going on?" and then a guy drove up to her on a motorcycle with flowers (like a date) and with that she totally became oblivious to the bedlam that was going on in front of her...

LUCKILY - my cell phone was ringing with a text and it woke me from my slumber. IT WAS FREAKY... I do remember at one point, I was on what was supposed to be KSC campus and there were some other girls that partied with this fraternity and one girl ended up standing with her feet in the toilet, swirling around and then fell and hit her head on the bath tub and died. WEIRD - Please tell me what all of this means?

ANY WHO...

At work, my friend Holly and I are Co-Chairs of the Social Committee - so we orchestrated a JEANS DAY for today because it is Lee National Denim Day - people need to pay $5 to wear jeans and the proceeds go to Breast Cancer research - we have raised approximately $900.00 - which I think is awesome.

What frosts my fanny is that there are people here today WEARING JEANS who did not pay! That is just lower than low and I hope they all rot in hell.

Eskimo words for snow

I was going to be all witty and try to make a great analogy for what I am going to blog about and relate it to the myriad of words Eskimos have for snow - so I went to Google and it pointed me in the direction of Wikipedia. I got all excited and started to read it and it says:
"It is a popular urban legend that the Inuit or Eskimo have an unusually large number of words for snow. In reality, the number of words depends on the definitions of Eskimo (there are a number of language) and snow, and on the method of counting numbers of words in languages that have quite different grammatical structures from English"

So, that totally ruins my plans for an awesome blog and almost made me forget what I was going to blog about... I digress.

Yesterday was a crazy day. I think most work days are just crazy. I am not sure what my damage is, but I have been feeling VERY overwhelmed this week, like I am carrying the weight of the world on my shoulders, unnecessarily for that matter. I am not sure what has brought this about, but it just happens. First I thought it was the weather yesterday and I was just down in the dumps, but them later on in the day I started feeling better - and jovial and back to my ole self... Then I decided I must just be hypoglycemic... I don't know where that came from, but it was definitely the way I could explain how I feel yucky all morning- almost EVERY MORNING- and it is a fine line between feeling hungry or nauseous. This is every morning... So, again I googled it:

Hypoglycemia is the medical term for a pathologic state produced by a lower than normal level of glucose (sugar) in the blood.

While there is some degree of variability among people, most will usually develop symptoms suggestive of hypoglycemia when blood glucose levels are lowered to the mid 50's. The first set of symptoms are called neuro-genic (or sympathetic) because they relate to the nervous system's response to hypoglycemia. Patients may experience any of the following;
nervousness,
sweating,
intense hunger,
trembling,
weakness,
palpitations, and
often have trouble speaking.

Okay - That rules me out - now back to my story...

So, after a crazy day, it ended out wonderful. I hung out with friends and had great company to lift my spirits. Yesterday ended wonderfully and today started beautifully as well and I hope my mood continues to stay even keel and prosper.

I guess now that I have learned that it is just an Urban legend about the Eskimo words for snow, I can't really relate it to my blog - I wanted to say that in Spanish there are many ways to say you love stuff - There is a word for loving things and there is a word for loving people - one of the words for loving a person is actually saying, "I want you" interestingly enough. What I am trying to say is how do you know the "strength" of the word to say you love someone? When do you know it is the right time to move from the meager liking of something to expressing that stronger word of love? Maybe I am too analytical and worrisome, but I don't know when it is appropriate.

So now that the world is all perfectly in alignment once again, maybe I should just pick an Eskimo word *(no matter what the dialect)* and use that to equate how I feel. People may not know what I mean, but I will, and I will not run the risk of saying it too early.

GRAMMAR POLICE

OMG- If I hear, "YOU WELCOME" one more time I may vomit. It is a contraction for "You are welcome" becoming "You're welcome". This can't be just a NH thing, right? In both Liberty offices I have worked in, in Dover and now here, I hear it DAILY.


AAAAAAARRRRRRGGGGGHHHHHH!

I'm not ready for winter

My favorite seasons are seasons of transition. I love FALL and SPRING! I like when it isn't too warm and isn't too hot. I am not looking forward to the winter for many reasons

1. I am so not ready for commuting in snow storms and inclement weather
2. I am just not ready for snow. I hate shoveling, wearing a jacket, not wearing sandals
3. I love blustery fall days where a sweatshirt and a fleece vest is enough - but having to bundle up in a winter jacket, scarf, boots, hat, YUCK!
4. The days are getting shorter and darker and I feel the depression setting in
5. I dislike the holidays of this season, my family seems to cancel Thanksgiving and Christmas to spite themselves so I don't enjoy them, they are just another day for me.
6. When the days shorten, I don't see any sunlight and I am the type of person who needs sunshine to brighten my day.
7. I don't play any sports in the winter, I used to play volleyball and now I don't know of anything like that available. Although I bitched a lot about driving to Dover to play, I still did it.
8. I need new clothes and shoes and I just can't afford winter clothes right now.
9. I HATE WINTER

Does anyone have any pros for this approaching season?